Trash Tuesday #103: Where Getting it Cheap is Part of the Esthetic
by Pasadena Adjacent
Now that I’m a shaman in training, I’m expected to write down my dreams. A way to keep track of my flight between present reality and my luminous field. What I’ve discovered isn’t friendly animal archetypes lending me a hand. No, my dreams are a boiling caldron of anxiety and fears. Soul pain. The morning after waking up from a dream where I had been cornered by a team of begging scam artist’ – I found myself overwhelmed by a feeling of dread. A few hours later I was to discover that my beloved neighbors, Lupe and Lupe plus cat, are leaving. Two and a half years of consideration and quiet.
So we did what any paranoid home owner would do. We got ahold of the landowner to enquire about our new neighbors. And the news isn’t to our liking. A couple (good) with two Doberman Pinchers (bad). Hate me for NOT enjoying the prospect of two dogs lunging at my property line every time we walk out the back door to spend time in our yard (re: sanctuary) – including Twyla’s Tower. I’ve been assured that the dogs are kept indoors – excuse my skepticism, but why else would you rent a tiny house with a large yard? On the positive side, perhaps I should be grateful it’s not a Norwegian ‘death metal’ band moving in. I’ve got three days of anticipated peace, then “more will be revealed.”
In the meantime, if your in need of a barbecue, dresser and what appears to be two lightly used mattresses, come and get um.
.
.
Pasadena Adjacent 
In the Editor’s neighborhood of Pasadena Adjacent Highland Park, trash collection takes place on a Tuesday. The night before is a good time to canvas the neighborhood for castaways. It’s great sport. We use Tuesday on our blog to post the Editor’s treasures. If we haven’t scored any good curbside finds “Trash Tuesday” becomes “Tag Sale Tuesday” where the phrase “getting it cheap is part of the esthetic” still remains apropos
“Getting it cheap is part of the esthetic” was coined by photographer D Gordon
http://www.dgorton.com/
The Editor
LikeLike
I feel sorry for you. I’m barked at by my neighbor’s vicious spaniel every time I go into my back garden. There’s no way I can enjoy any tranquillity, or even play with my dogs, while being yelled at. I know what she’s saying, and it’s not nice. Let’s hope the Dobermen are kept indoors as promised.
Our Editor Responds: We have a similar issue at the bottom of our property where Mr V has set up a work station. Two yappers. The owners own Firefly Bistro in South Pasadena. Translation – we’re never home, NEVER!
They thought it would be a good idea to get two dogs for their daughters. You know, teach them empathy and responsibility. Then they decided it was a good idea to leave their daughter’s with their parents who live in a better school district. The dogs are not so lucky – and neither are we. I tried bribes, squirting them with the hose, confrontations via Mr V. The only thing I didn’t try was animal control and cyanid. The owners eventually set up a fenced section outside their back door. Didn’t stop the yapping completely – but age has slowed them down.
Did I mention the recent acquisition of a German Shepherd the next house up? Here’s an idea – get a cat
LikeLike
I used to have a dobie mix. She was glued to my side at all times. She had OCD… I think I told you. She never barked incessantly at the neighbors because she was always with me…I think I told you about her, yes. An unfortunate physical attribution of the dobie head -tiny and then the long spindly legs paired not well with the cast iron weighted chest and stomach of a chocolate lab. She often lost her balance and slammed against walls causing a great shaking 8.4s, at least. Bring the BBQ over and we’ll have a party. May your dreams improve and brighten as the measurement grows shorter towards boxsprings, boxsprings, boxsprings. Here is a poem by Billy Collins that I hope never fits the situation:
Another Reason Why I Don’t Keep A Gun In The House
The neighbors’ dog will not stop barking.
He is barking the same high, rhythmic bark
that he barks every time they leave the house.
They must switch him on on their way out.
The neighbors’ dog will not stop barking.
I close all the windows in the house
and put on a Beethoven symphony full blast
but I can still hear him muffled under the music,
barking, barking, barking,
and now I can see him sitting in the orchestra,
his head raised confidently as if Beethoven
had included a part for barking dog.
When the record finally ends he is still barking,
sitting there in the oboe section barking,
his eyes fixed on the conductor who is
entreating him with his baton
while the other musicians listen in respectful
silence to the famous barking dog solo,
that endless coda that first established
Beethoven as an innovative genius.
Our Editor Responds: Did your Dobie succumb to Dobie issues? I remember a period (like all dog breeds) when Dobies became the ‘it’ dog.
Yes, Billy Collins has it right – though I’d be inclined to shoot the owners first. Mr V is noise sensitive. Sensitive with a capitol ‘S’ Nothing will put him on edge faster – and if Daddy ain’t happy, ain’t no-body gonna be happy.”
BTW: someone came by and grabbed all the curbside booty shortly after I wrote the post. You’ll have to drop by here if you want B-B-Q. You have two days of relative silence
LikeLike
Please don’t squeeze the shaman! OR, bite her!
Our Editor Responds: Again, your on a roll – pass the dogs
LikeLike
I am so sorry to hear of your possible impending annoyance. This is why, even after I lost my home to a hurricane, I decided to reward myself and bought a fixer upper on half an acre in a redneckish kind of neighborhood where people live on even bigger lots – so I wouldn’t have to put up with the dogs and neighbors from hell I had to tolerate in our other neighborhood. If I choose to I don’t have to see anyone for days on end. It’s wonderful.
Our Editor Responds: Neighborly confrontation has been the norm for us. Most the folks in my hood are relatively quiet. But we seem to attract the noise makers. On the plus side, these are renters. Also city dog laws now give the dogless some power over our environment. Wish the same laws applied to loud music (re: Norwegian death metal bands).
LikeLike
Hope the new neighbors and their dogs turn out to be a happy surprise.
Our Editor Responds: I can only hope. See where that lock is on the metal gate? I’m on my computer right this moment, on the north west corner of my garage/studio. I am approximately 8 feet from that edge (maybe less). Yes, I can only hope.
Am grateful that the house flippers removed the motion activated megawatt lighting system that my previous asshole neighbors had aimed at that very entrance. Yes the same neighbors from hell who refused to park their Chevy Suburban X-Tra humongous, in front of their property and instead had it’s butt end firmly placed in front of my studio picture window. Denying me a lovely view, light and an opportunity to park in front of my own property. Don’t even get me started on that lovely lab of theirs who spent his entire life without ever having been taken out on a walk. Can you tell I’m still traumatized by the experience?
http://distractify.com/fun/pranks/letters-between-australian-troll-and-neighbor-over-floodlight/
LikeLike
Billy Collins’ oboe dog is crying for his people. This dog has abandonment issues.
Is “hate” too strong a word to use for people who won’t do their dogs the kindness of training them? These a-holes are the reason people want to outlaw perfectly lovely dogs like pit bulls. A few years ago it was Dobermans.
The people are the problem and it makes me fricking furious.
I hope your new neighbors are not a problem.
Our Editor Responds: I’d also add that that is the reason why sooooo many dogs at shelters are year olds.
LikeLike
Ah, the classics. And so it shall ever be in the neighborhood wars of cat vs dog. I agree with everything Petra wrote. Always the humans who fail to be responsible. It makes me angry to see a neglected dog chained to a tree or penned up in a tiny grassless enclosure or alone inside all day long. Too many pet owners don’t deserve to have one. I also hope things go well with the new neighbors.
Ha – don’t squeeze the shaman – very clever.
Our Editor Responds: Ferrermen is a pro with a pun.
Here in Los Angeles there’s a cultural issue around how we treat dogs. Some cultures see them as dogs to guard the family; livestock. Why they chose the more aggressive large breeds. These cultures also tend to fence their front yards with tacky iron metal and never allow Fido in the house. Poor dogs spend their day on the other side of the fence line. Their only joy is food and laying in wait to ambush pedestrians.
LikeLike
I break out in a cold sweat when my neighbors move. A kid with a drum kit — that’s my biggest fear.
But if he looked like the Norwegian Death metal fan? (yes, this requires you to visit the link – and I know you haven’t)
LikeLike
I’ve decided that “hate” is too strong a word. So I despise these people instead.
I have a good way for you to get good neighbors. When you see people looking at the place, go meet them. Say hi, wow, you think you might be the new tenants here? (You are quietly making your judgement during the conversation.) Got any dogs? We have a cat. Plus (if you like them) we’re very quiet (and if you don’t) Victor’s in a band, they practice here most of the time.
Or “We’re nudists.”
Or whatever works.
Our Editor Responds: The problem is that I don’t see them. This means I’ve done everything humanly possible to not see them – trendy red wood slat fence atop a cinderblock wall that we added an additional brick layer to.
Our neighbors didn’t tell us they were leaving until the U-Haul was parked in front – darn them. What we did then was get the number of the landlord (who bought the house from the flippers who bought the house in a foreclosure auction from the belly-up owners who were the king of assholes and a 13 year pox on our happiness). He had already rented out the house when we called him. And Mr V will be over there introducing himself and establishing his list of concerns. Nudity would land me on the internet – the chubby cat lady with the purple hair.
Of course hearing is a different problem all together and they both work.
LikeLike
Run away from home and hire a DJ to come over and rock Dutch bleepy house and trance for a few hours. That will solve all your problems.
Our Editor Responds: Good idea. I will be feared and loathed among all my neighbors (both human and four legged).
I had a 2200 foot studio in downtown from 85 – 99. The top on a two story building. Saw numerous renters come and go. The worst were the bands. Usually some near-do-well living off his girlfriend. One such jack off was so loud when they practiced that we couldn’t talk to one another without shouting. You couldn’t outrun this noise. Not only that, they had the audacity to have only a few songs in their limited repertoire. Neil Young’s Cinnamon girl seemed to be their favorite – over and over and over and over and over………..
LikeLike
Like Karin, I fear so much to have a kid or a teenager exercising their drum near my house. I have been thinking to move to a city… I am so tired to live in country… but I am concern with the noise I will have in a city, because here I have almost an absolute silence…
Our Editor Responds: are you thinking of an apartment? The city verses the country. I hope when I get old I can find a bit of that silence. Why I’m always looking at real estate in other states. But I wonder how many amenities I enjoy in the big city I’m prepared to live without.
LikeLike
Our Editor is Concerned: workers showed up next door with ten 4’x 8′ sheets of plywood
LikeLike
Yikes.
LikeLike
Shouldn’t there be some sort of building permit applied for, approved and posted in their window? Sounds like all the makings for a shed or possibly a folly?
Our Editor Responds: I’m a fan of folly – as long as it’s brilliant.
LikeLike
Our Editor Responds: I don’t get it. Plywood has been delivered and not a peep since. I’m just hoping the plywood is for some additional finish work…
on the plus side, I was able to saw down some saplings which I figured would be tomorrows burden. Everything grows south and onto my side of the fence. I’m now regretting that I didn’t get that noxious ??? tree
LikeLike
I hope they are well behaved canines.
Our next door neighbors have six dogs. They are pretty quite until one of the barks, then it’s pure chaos. They really do try to keep them quiet, but six dogs? No way.
Our Editor Responds: So do I. The neighbors have moved in but I don’t think the dogs have. At least i haven’t heard them….and that would be great.
Six dogs? shoot me (and my cat) now
LikeLike
We have four cats and three of them don’t even seem to hear the dogs anymore. However, the fourth cat (who at 26 pounds and really tall (?), is bigger than three of the dogs), usually runs to the door and growls.
LikeLike
http://tinypic.com/player.php?v=ddhliv&s=5#
LikeLike
Stop right there – You got a problem with Norwegian death metal bands?! That’s all we listen to in winter here in the great white north.
cabin fever –
my nicotine patch
for a beer glass coaster
Our Editor Responds: I love nicotine patches
LikeLike